The ghost of Raymond Chandler sat in the leather chair stroking my cat, Midnight,
who was more than a little rattled to be that close to a ghost.
"I looked for you all last weekend, son. But you were off on your blood runs.
You do know Lincoln died to end slavery, don't you?" Midnight squirmed and popped out of his arms, and I said, "Saturday was your birthday, wasn't it, sir?" "Yes, and Clemens and Hemingway threw me a party
where Clemens insisted on only talking about himself and Hemingway kept challenging me to box.
I pulled out my automatic and both of them became blessedly scarce!" "Ghosts can kill ghosts?" "You wrote GHOST OF A CHANCE about it, remember?"
"Even put you, Mark Twain, and Hemingway in it, too."
Chandler nodded,
"Like me, you sneaked into it a quality which readers would not shy off from,
perhaps not even know was there …
but which would somehow distill through
their minds and leave an afterglow."
"I tried."
Chandler shook his head, "November is coming where many of your friends will try to vomit as many words as they can a day."
He snorted, "I took four months to distill my first short story. Four months. I continued to work with painstaking slowness when I began to write
novels.
I believe that all writing that has any life in it is done with
the solar plexus. It is hard work.”
Midnight, over his fright, jumped back into his lap as Chandler continued,
"Ten years after my first story was published, I was still on the breadline
with four novels behind me."
He sighed, "I began to wonder if the effort had been
worth it.
But by 1945 cheap reprints of my books were selling in their
hundreds of thousands,
and the critics who had hitherto ignored me were
vying to outdo each other with superlatives."
Chandler snorted, "The world is simultaneously a horrible and beautiful place."
His words made me think of what he had his detective say in THE LONG GOODBYE:
“I hear voices crying in the night and I go see what’s the matter. You
don’t make a dime that way…
I’ve got a five-thousand-dollar bill in my
safe but I’ll never spend a nickel of it.
Because there was something
wrong with the way I got it.
I played with it a little at first and I
still get it out once in a while and look at it.”
I thought to myself as I watched him pet Midnight
that the best we as writers can do is make the most of our books, trying to make poetry out of the pulp of our dreams.
In only a little over a month, Heather McCorkle's latest novel is unleashed upon the cyber-world. Twice Turned, her next novel in her paranormal series
about modern day Viking werewolves, is coiled ready to pounce upon her many fans. I think Heather's cover is original and imaginative, linking a bare chest to the werewolf the protagonist becomes
and not to the embrace of a clothing-challenged maiden.
Let's talk about those covers and the bad rap they get based on the stereotype.
As Iago said in Othello,
"Reputation is an idle and most false imposition,
oft got without merit and lost without deserving."
So Remember:
It's a romance cover, and with that comes a certain level of expectation.
Romances in general are female fantasy.
Of course, women would want to fantasize about Ryan Gosling not Pee Wee Herman! 50 million Elvis fans revitalized the music scene,
and those who pick up romances help create a billion-dollar book industry!
It used to be you wanted to have a cover that would snare the reader from the store shelf.
But store shelves are shrinking, and the books on them change faster than Taylor Swift's boyfriends!
So you want covers that jump off the screen, covers that are eye-catching,
and capture the attention of people who are browsing with the swipe of a
finger.
Look at how Gal Gadot recently got the attention of her male fans with her Instagram photo
As a counselor, I have seen too many doughnut burns --
when a child is shoved into a tub of scalding water,
the anus tightens in response so that the burn is round with a ring of unburned skin in the center.
I have counseled too many daughters of sexually abusing fathers whose scars, though invisible, will never completely heal. Single mother households are unfortunately becoming the new “norm.”
Novellas (long short stories) are starting to make a comeback. But they have been around for a while.
Animal Farm (George Orwell)
A Christmas Carol (Charles Dickens)
Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde (Robert Louis Stevenson)
The Turn of the Screw (Henry James)
The Time Machine (H.G. Wells)
Now. they are starting to rear their print heads again.
Jason Arthur of Penguin Random House was quoted as saying
“If a novel is
something that you can lose yourself in, get comfortable in and spend
weeks reading, a short story will give you a blast like a cold shower.”
Stephen King loves reading and writing short stories.
So do I. I will take his advice:
"You should write because it brings you happiness and fulfillment. I did it for the pure joy of the thing. And if you can do it for
joy, you can do it forever.”
I am currently working on a collection of new short stories -
SILHOUETTES IN THE KEY OF SCREAM
(which includes these new tales)
THE DEAD HAVE NO SAY -
A post WWII movie lot at night. A sociopathic prop master.
A severed hand. A dying actress.
All elements of a strange revenge whose victim is not who you think.
THE LEFT HAND OF GOD -
A small village that hates God.
A series of mysterious disappearances of its priests.
And why do the rose bushes of the rectory bloom so lushly?
ALIVE YET NOT -
The things that death can buy are often not what they seem. An aging crime lord finds that the dead are past bargaining with.
We all want to write a best-seller. Not for fame nor for fortune.
Just to be able to support ourselves living out our dream. But how to do that?
I could date Margo Robbie, of course, but I think her new husband might object.
And he is really big! No.
We will have to do it the old-fashioned way: by using the tools at hand the best way we know how.
HOW TO ULYSSES YOUR WAY
TO NOVEL SUCCESS
1.) SUCKER PUNCH YOUR READER WITH THE FIRST SENTENCE
The thinking behind the studio's thinking on making movie trailers of late is
TO MAKE IT SO COMPELLING THAT PEOPLE HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO BUY A TICKET
no matter what the critics say.
The first sentence to my story in TALES TO BE TOLD AT MIDNIGHT is "The rape had been the best thing to have happened to her." How could you not want to read on? And remember the FIRST LOOK option on Amazon will hook your reader
if you just set the bait correctly.
2.) LEARN FROM THE MOST POPULAR GIRL IN HIGH SCHOOL
BE FAST.
Not free. People value what they pay for. But put out ... as quickly as you can with quality one after another.
You want to have other books to offer should lightning strike and you gain a fan. Which leads me into the next point:
3.) BRAND YOURSELF WITH A SERIES
It won't hurt much,
but it will give a new fan certainty
of enjoying more adventures with the characters she or he has grown to love. Readers who like one novel will confidently buy the next.
And the series name will draw the eye of past readers browsing thumbnails of your book covers.
Which leads me to my next point:
4.) LET YOUR TITLE BE LIKE THE SKIRTS OF THAT POPULAR GIRL
BE SHORT
Choose a brief emotive title. Pack it with meaning, menace and drama.
Why short?
Your cover will shrink to a fingernail on Kindle and other mobile devices.
So make it legible!
James Patterson uses such titles:
ZOO, THE FIRE, WITCH & WIZARD, THE QUICKIE
Which, of course, leads me to the next point as well
4.) ATTENTION SPANS HAVE CHANGED
TV sound bites, Twitter feeds, Buzz feeds, Facebook posts ... All of them have conditioned those who still read to bore easily.
A bored reader is more dangerous to us than any lion, for you will lose them as customers.
Keep your sentences as short as models' skirts.
James Patterson is the expert here.
His sentences average just six words.
His paragraphs are typically no longer than five lines and often just one line.
Tell your story your way, but if it is to make an impact there is a model to follow.
5.) WE ARE A LONELY SOCIETY
Give your MC a foil character with whom to talk ... even if it is only the moon. Even Tom Hanks had Wilson, the basketball,
with whom to share his innermost thoughts and fears on that island. Conversations with the buddy character can introduce conflict to keep a
scene alive,
give the main character a plausible sounding board for
their woes and triumphs,
and also prompt the protagonist to revealinformation.
Foil characters also furnish sub-plots.
Get them into troubles of their own. Make them victims. Use a foil as a series character in your every novel as I do with Mark Twain
in my NOT-SO-INNOCENTS series and in my Egyptian Victorian fantasies.
6.) A PLOT WORTHY OF A MOVIE
Dueling vampire empires, alien evil clashing with ancient darkness,
Mark Twain, Oscar Wilde, Nikola Tesla --
all worrying less about saving the world than
saving their friend who is married to a demon-empress, poised to set all the world ablaze with her dark ambition. Outlandish but so was SHE and LORD OF THE RINGS. You must strive to craft a riveting plot worthy of your reader.
7.) WATER COOLER DIALOGUE
My blood center still has a water cooler and coffee maker where workers chat a bit during the day. Work to have your dialogue be quoted at the water cooler of today's culture: Twitter, Facebook, Buzz Feeds, personal blogs. There is a reason NIKE sells ball caps and T-shirts with their logo. Be as smart as NIKE, have your fans advertise for you.