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I heard sobbing at work today.
Not crying.
To me, crying is surface pain.
Sobbing is heart-deep.
A dying friend. No one at work seemingly understanding. I understood.
I had been there.
"ALONE
Yes, that's the key word, the most awful word in the English tongue. Murder doesn't hold a candle to it and hell is only a poor synonym.”
- Stephen King
What happens when we lose a close friend?
Sadly, this form of loss is not always acknowledged or understood.
What did Mark Twain write?
“Nothing that grieves us can be called little: by the eternal laws of proportion a child's loss of a doll and a king's loss of a crown are events of the same size.”
WHAT DO YOU DO?
Realize you've taken quite a hit.
Healing from it will take time. Day by day the wound will close.
Let yourself grieve.
The emptiness will stay with you for awhile.
Nights are long, but
THEY ARE NOT FOREVER.
Realize there are no
"7 Easy Steps To Healing"
You hurt. Period. How long?
Each of us heals at a different rate.
Society just does not get it that the loss of a friend is like an invisible amputation.
Many people suck and are so self-focused that your worth to them is what you can do FOR them .
Not the other way around.
Others may not acknowledge the depth of your relationship,
but it is important you remember that you have every right to the grief and devastation you feel.
FRIENDS ARE ALWAYS
PRESENT TENSE
Remember that emptiness I talked about earlier?
It slowly gets filled with memories of your friend, your friend's words, jokes, and advice.
Sometimes you will almost feel their presence by your side, chiding or talking with you.
It will get so that when you come upon a confounding situation,
you will hear your friend's advice or critique of it.
Close friends become
a part of you.
You know how they felt about life.
Their remembered laughter in the night will make it not so dark.
It will take a while to get there ... but you will.
I know. I did.
Friendship is as deep as, and sometimes more so, than family. We picked them, so we both like and love them. And yes, it's a huge hole in our hearts.
ReplyDeleteIt's like people who don't like animals - they don't get that the loss of a pet is a loss of a family member.
Exactly, our friends come to us or we to them by choice not by chance ... and their loss is an invisible amputation that few can see. The same for pets who give us nothing but unconditional love.
DeleteI've experienced deep sobbing over loss. Loss is usually there forever in your heart. I don't usually feel alone even though I am alone most of the time. So I have to remember that others do feel so.
ReplyDeleteI have always been a loner and shy. Now, I've become solitary and saddened by the games people play in the world I inhabit. Like you, I am alone most of the time ... except my world of characters in my head!
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