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Monday, December 8, 2014

UNCERTAINTY, THE LURKER IN THE SHADOWS


 Our brains are wired to seek certainty and avoid uncertainty.

 We not only shy away from uncertainty but also crave certainty.

And yet, to be an Indie Author requires going all the way against that. So how do we cope with uncertainty?

1.) THE WALKING DEAD perspective:




Indie Authors shoulder uncertainty because they see no other alternative.

Writing is something that is bone of your bone.  You write because you are compelled.  There are no easy roads to success in writing.

That is true for all of life.  

There are no certainties but death and pain.  Weeds come up on their own.  Roses and  vegetables must be planted, watered, and watched over.  The same is true of a fulfilling life.


2.) Indie Authors endure uncertainty because they realize FAILURE is a certainty if they do nothing.

The same is true for the rest of our lives.  We struggle and plan and persist since that is the only way to the dawn of our dreams.


3.)  The BAMBOO PERSPECTIVE:


There is nothing that happens over night. There is a growth principle; when you put a seed into the ground, it does not just blossom immediately. You have to water it, you have to nurture it.

 It is a process. 

If you fall, get up and walk again. If you fall again, get up again. You have to go into it with the humility of a baby.


4.) "IT IS WHAT IT IS" PERSPECTIVE:

The twenty-first century -- where everything is possible and nothing is certain.

It is necessary to appreciate that our body/mind's automatic reaction to change and uncertainty is stress

As a result, our stress arousal system is "on" all the time, a natural security reaction to constant demands to adapt to newness.

Therefore, in our post-modern digital world, our body/mind almost never properly breaks out of a chronic low level stress.

We may not be able to control what's happening "out there" 

but we all can learn how to quiet and center ourselves, renew our being, and replenish our core.

This can be done by accessing uncommon rest and recuperation through "the relaxation response", 

a measurable and natural shift in the mind and body triggered by a one-pointed focusing of the mind.

When simple mental techniques and breathing exercises are practiced several times, 

the ability to reduce the volume of the stress becomes progressively easier.


5.) BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE IN THE WORLD:


You should take risks, because life isn't about having all the answers and knowing for sure what's going to happen tomorrow.

Resting in the knowledge that nothing ever stays the same while boldly making the most of any situation, can bring a certain level of inner peace and satisfaction.


6.) REPLACE EXPECTATIONS WITH PLANS:


When you form expectations, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. 

You can guide your tomorrow, but you can’t control the exact outcome.

The future is not in your hands right now

What is in your hands is what you plan

what you will actively do to find balance and live in the mind-set you want.


7.) FOCUS ON WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL:


Oftentimes we overlook the little things we can do to make life easier while obsessing about the big things we can’t do.  

A large task can seem daunting. 

Cutting it up into small do-able activities and attacking them one by one will have you scaling the largest mountain:

One hand hold at a time and Mt. Everest is climbed.

 " I wanted a perfect ending. 

Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end.

Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.”  
Gilda Radner


14 comments:

  1. There are only so many things in life we can control...

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  2. Left a comment re the word verification on last post, or one of your last posts. Google may have added it to any comments without blogowner approval.

    The trailer is nicely done. And a good friend is a nice treasure to have.
    Hubs is home now, so time is of the essence and scarce.

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  3. Alex:
    Everything may be taken from us but our choice in our attitude to the circumstances of our life, right?

    D.G.:
    Isn't that trailer done well? I will have to look at my settings yet one more time.

    In a way, having a loved one in the hospital gives us breathing space where having them in-house removes most free time. I've been there. You and your husband are in my prayers. :-)

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  4. Looks like I have found a way to stop that word verification!

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  5. Thank you for your help with the dreaded Word Verification. I am suffering from Google paranoia ~ I am convinced they are after me, ever since I dreamed they were in the Tower of London, doing terrible things to our blogs and then blogged about them. (I was watching The Tudors at the time.)

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  6. Sometimes uncertainty has a lot of charm.
    My chronic illness is a case in point. I don't know what will happen - or when. And I am happy with that.
    Glad that embedding your comments removed WV.
    And my thoughts are also with D.G Hudson and her husband. A very tiring, stressful time for them both.

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  7. I often feel like I don't even have the present in my hands, let alone my future. On my best days I treat uncertainty like a game, have some fun with it, and laugh while I can. On my bad days I brood. Ah well.

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  8. These are wonderful and wise life lessons for everyone, not just for indie writers. I came back here to read this and also to thank you for your WV advice. I have now shared it with three other blogger friends of mine. I looks like it is now all over the blogs. Take care.

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  9. Inger:
    Be careful what you watch before sleeping! I think Blogger may well have it set up that they are flagged when their name is written on the blogs they provide us.

    But then, I have been watching PERSON OF INTEREST and COVERT AFFAIRS non-stop these past weeks!

    I'm glad I got you some relief with the dreaded WV -- Elephant's Child gave me and Alex the key.

    Elephant's Child:
    I've just gotten through bragging about you to Inger. If only I had the gift of Healing, I would make your body stronger and well!

    I read an interesting book, SECOND SON (made into a terrible movie) where a man who made such a wish was granted it -- and it turned his life into something of a nightmare.

    My thoughts are with D.G. and her husband and Inger and hers, too.

    May your Holidays be all you wish them to be!

    Helena:
    I've lost things I took for granted, and it has taught me that I am more blessed than I believed -- and that, if I look hard enough, I will spot even more blessings in my life. :-)

    Uncertainty is no fun. Yet, it is our daily companion. Laughter, as you suggest, is a great antidote! Victor, my young hero, lives that route. May you have a great week.

    Thank you for heading me to that book of WILDE IN AMERICA. It may spark a novel where he, Twain, and my hero, McCord tour the "Wilde West!" And I think I might just have stumbled upon the title of that book!! :-)

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  10. Inger:
    Yes, WV is something of a flu virus right now. I'm glad Elephant's Child & I could help you and our other friends!

    This post seems to be getting popular across the Net. Perhaps because, like you said, it speaks to how to live life not just write. This is certainly the Age of Uncertainty.

    If you got something positive here, let others know of my meager post.

    And thanks for coming back. My cyber-door is always open!

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  11. Your post is excellent. Uncertainty may frighten us, but it can't kill us unless we allow it to do so.

    Love,
    Janie

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  12. Hi, Roland...

    Yes, it is me... lol. I haven't fallen off the face of the earth, yet.

    OH... the uncertainty of life. Gotta love it. My life these past few months has been like a cyclone. All good, thank God, but INSANE.

    You know how moving is? And downsizing is so much worse. One accumulates so much in ten years. The wall had to have expanded because packing up all my STUFF, took me weeks and I could never fit all my things in the new place so another chunk of my life is stuffed in storage. Now I have one here in Chicago and one in Florida...

    Chicago will be home for me for another year, but I am looking for my next life in another state. NY is at the top, but the coop I wanted my not happen. The owner hasn't accepted my offer. He is holding out for more. It is overpriced and needs to be gutted, but he doesn't seem to care. SO I am on the hunt a gain.

    I LOVE the insanity right now. Manly because I do love change and I grew stagnant living in the same space for ten years. Yes, it was beautiful, but I was entombed. Now I am a free spirit again and my soul is happy. I may even write again. LOL. It's been so long.

    I hope all is well with you my friend. I still pray for you and Sandra at the Shine of St. Frances Cabrini.

    I was so sad to read about D. G. and her husband's health issues. SO sad, especially during this time of year. I'll drop by the Shrine tomorrow and add her husband to my list of prayers.

    It's so lovely now. Such a special place. All decked out for Christmas. I do love this time of year.

    Take care, my friend....

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  13. To be a writer at all is to live with uncertainty. I dream of being a famous author, but know my few short story publications - long forgotten by readers now - is probably all there will be for me. No Stephen King future for me. But, at least I had the taste for a short moment.

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  14. Janie:
    You're right: we pass from one stage to another, each one dominated by uncertainty ... but also with promise of something better, too. :-)

    Michael!
    Great to hear from you!!

    Life is always something, isn't it? I hate, hate, hate moving!

    I moved from my burned down home to an efficiency apartment (which is basically you living in a bedroom!)

    Now, I am in a two bedroom, and I hope I stay there! No more moving, PLEASE!

    I mourn your lovely condo -- your photos of it were so beautiful (especially during this time of year!)

    Looking for a new place to live in NY must be madness. Prices are so outrageous there for living arrangements.

    If you do start writing again, you will find your perceptions and writing deepened by all the experiences you have undergone. I wish you the best of luck there!

    Thanks for praying for me, Sandra, D.G. and her husband at the Shine of St. Frances Cabrini.

    Chicago at Christmas Season is a lovely place. I envy you the sights and sounds. :-)

    Donna:
    To be human is to live with uncertainty. I share your same dream. And who knows? Ours may one day come true!

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