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Here are my two sentences for Summer Ross' NEW CREATION BLOGFEST :
http://summersvoice.blogspot.com/2010/12/new-creation-blogfest.html
Last Sentence of REMEMBER THE FALLEN :
And so did I, Fallen Rabshekah, last of the Tuatha de Danann, slip past the stony, open-armed grasp of Christ the Redeemer.
First Sentence of the YA urban fantasy I've just started, VICTOR'S NOT JUST MY NAME :
I don't want to say being twelve sucked, but I lost count of the number of times people tried to kill me.
***
http://summersvoice.blogspot.com/2010/12/new-creation-blogfest.html
Last Sentence of REMEMBER THE FALLEN :
And so did I, Fallen Rabshekah, last of the Tuatha de Danann, slip past the stony, open-armed grasp of Christ the Redeemer.
First Sentence of the YA urban fantasy I've just started, VICTOR'S NOT JUST MY NAME :
I don't want to say being twelve sucked, but I lost count of the number of times people tried to kill me.
***
Of all your characters, aside from Sam, Fallen in my favorite. Hands down. She's the main reason I want to finish the fanfic that's coming together in my head.....
ReplyDeleteIs there a search on here that will show me all the posts she's in?
Great sentences Roland! I really like your first sentence. Keep writing! Thank you for participating
ReplyDeleteWords Crafter : I sent you the short story I wrote for the ill girl in the hospital, showing Fallen right before she meets Blake. THE LAST FAERIE. It's set in New Zealand. I hope you enjoy it.
ReplyDeleteSummer : Thanks. Fallen does seem to be popular with my friends. Have a great blogfest, Roland
Fantastic first line and I love Victor's line.
ReplyDeleteWe need to start a Victor fan club, Roland. He is just too lovable.
MIchael
Both are excellent; the ending sentence leaves the story feeling complete, yet has so much longing.
ReplyDeleteThe new one describes excitement to come.
Well done.
On another note; that legendary race I was trying to remember a few posts ago - and then forgot I wanted to remember (lol) was the Tuatha de Danann. Thanks for the reminder :)
..........dhole
Awesome sentences, both. The first sentence really makes me want to read the rest of the story!
ReplyDeleteThey both leave me wanting more. The first is so rounded and I really want to have read the whole thing. The second is just perfect.
ReplyDeleteHi,
ReplyDelete1) Highly emotional sentence: of loss yet hope of a new beginning came across for me . . .
2) Great opening sentence: classic cocky persona of youth yet underlying sense of the fragile nature of mortality! ;)
best
F
Your 'last' sentence sent a shiver down my spine and has me intrigued to read more.
ReplyDeleteYour 'first' sentence made me laugh but conveyed so much character in just one line. Perfect.
Loved them both.
Lovely!! The last sentence was very sad for me and the first sentence was just a joy to read! Take care
ReplyDeletex
Both great sentences Roland but I identify with the starting one. Remember being 12, barely 80 pounds and thinking that :)
ReplyDeleteBTW, I loved the song the last name caught my attention :)
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow
Nice! They both intrigue me!
ReplyDeleteSecond one is great, Roland!
ReplyDeleteElena : I'm glad you like Victor's sentence. He, of course, likes you ... what with you giving voice to his thoughts on your blog.
ReplyDeletePK : Intrigue is the name of our game, isn't it? To try and hook a reader's interest and heart.
Jules : It is a haunting song, isn't it? I thought you'd like the last name. And you're right, at 12, sometimes attitude is all you have between you and a scary world.
Kitty : Yes, Fallen is a haunted, lonely soul. I'm glad you like both sentences.
Ellie : Thanks for liking both lines. Fallen's comes as she stands on the rear wing of the Hidenberg blimp in Rio as it passes directly in front of the Christ the Redeemer statue. I had the most eerie photo of that exact moment ... the large swastika on the wing contrasting with the stony calm face of Jesus.
Francine : You're always insightful. I hope your first week of 2011 is going well.
Margo : Thanks for the praise. Yes, in the ending sentence, I tried to convey the haunted yearning for some small measure of peace in the heart of the last fae. I'm glad that came across.
Damyanti : It means a lot that the ending sentence made you want to read the whole story.
Donna : Thanks for enjoying both sentences. Are you enjoying your first week back to work? Ugh! I hated going back after being off for six days. Sigh.
Michael : I'm glad you liked Fallen's ending line. And Victor likes you right back. Alice thinks he lovable and delectable, the two warring for control! Ouch, literally if delectable wins. LOL.
Love them!!
ReplyDeleteDespite it being only one sentence each, it's fascinating how your unique Roland Style shows through. The one about Fallen gives a definite sense of ending, and yet the idea of it not being quite that. Maybe.
And Victor...well, I already love him, but this is a fantastic first sentence. A hook, definately.
These are fantastic! I LOVE that opening sentence to your new YA. That is absolutely riveting and a perfect example of a gripping opening sentence.
ReplyDeleteGreat, great opener. If that doesn't grip right away then I don't know what will.
ReplyDeleteYour ending sentence is powerful. And...do I detect a little homage to "Willow" in Tuatha de Danann?
Impressive as always, Roland. I am loving this blogfest so much!
ReplyDelete~bru
Your writing is so expressive. Very intense words!
ReplyDeleteThose are awesome sentences!
ReplyDeleteLove that opening sentence!
ReplyDeleteHaha. I think that just about sums up the year of twelve. I love the obvious difference in voice between the two pieces.
ReplyDeleteYour opening sentence was very good it dragged me into the world of a very unlucky twelve-year-old.
ReplyDeleteTrue Roland style!!! I've been..ehm...stalking your blog for a while now, and I love your unique voice!
ReplyDeleteLast sentence: I get a definite sense of transition here, a passage into another 'realm' (hypothetically speaking). That's always a nice way to end a story.
First sentence: poor Victor - but then there's also a sense of strenght somehow. He isn't going to give up anytime soon.
I'm very intrigued by the first one. I want to know more! And the second is so funny and engrossing. Just draws you in.
ReplyDelete~ Bess
Bess : Thanks. I think Fallen is one of my more interesting characters -- she's open to so many different uses. Victor is sassy, isn't he?
ReplyDeleteSash : Thanks for visiting,even if from the cyber shadows. You're very insightful with both sentences. Thanks for following.
Elaine : Victor would say he just has strange luck. LOL. Your comments mean a lot to me.
Tary : Keen eye you have there to pick up on the change in voice of each character. Glad you enjoyed my sentences.
Mara : Victor applauds your choice of his sentence. He's humble like that. LOL.
Ann : Good to see you here. Better that you like my sentences. Come back, now, please.
Olga : Your praise helps me on a weary day. I've worked 11 hours straight and driven 300 miles. Whew!
February Grace : This was a fun blogfest, but 11 hours and 300 miles have given me no time to visit my friends' entries. Even now, I'm squeezing this in on my 10 minute break!
Wendy : Keen eye on the "Willow" connection. And thanks for liking my two sentences. Now, if only I can snare the attention of an agent!
Heather : Your praise and positive assessment of my sentences means a great to me coming from you.
Tessa : Thanks so much for the great words about being able to tell my style just from one sentence. I was just writing a personal comment to your entry when the blood center called for me to come in early. Rats. 11 hours and 300 miles later, I'm still here! Whew! Have a great 1st week of 2011.
Hi Roland! Your closing sentence has a great deal of character in the voice. Very nice. and the opening sentence will definitely grab a twelve-year-old's attention! both well written!
ReplyDeleteDanette : Your insightful words mean a lot to me. Victor is appreciative, too. (the now 13 year old Ulysses.) Have a great first week of 2011, Roland
ReplyDeleteGreat sentences. Love the premise. My first time to your blog - great to meet you! :)
ReplyDeleteMargo : A great big hello for your first time at my blog-home. I'm glad you enjoyed the sentences, Roland
ReplyDeleteEnding sentence - okay, Fallen's one of the Tuatha - one of the mythological peoples of Ireland. And he's slipping past the grasp of Christ? That intrigues me, and I want to know what came before the ending.
ReplyDeleteFirst sentence - kinda dark and depressing, but also exciting. Who are these people who want to kill a twelve-year old kid?