So you can read my books

Monday, April 9, 2012

H is for HIBBS_On My Side of Your Eyes

Thanks to all of you that have bought THE BEAR WITH TWO SHADOWS :

My fable is a tiny candle in the cyber-night. But its flame grows stronger each time one of you buys it.

"Thank You" is too small a phrase, but it is all I have.



Here is one of the teaching tales found in THE BEAR WITH TWO SHADOWS which Hibbs remembers when confronted with a mystery as a grown bear in Ancient Eire :

Hibbs' scalp suddenly prickled. Yet again, Hibbs' present had been swallowed up by his past. No longer was he in Eire nor even a grown bear.

Instead of the wet smell of spring, the crisp chill of Autumn tickled his wrinkling nose. But he was still walking beside a long-striding Estanatlehi.

It was his first week in the Valley of the Shadow -- long before he knew it well enough to be cautious of what lay within its dark corners.

And he wasn't exactly walking beside GrandMother. Rather he was bouncing all around her, filled with the energy and wonder of all young cubs

The Turquoise Woman was frowning at him as he skipped and leapt in a circle around her. "I hate to see you so sad."

"Oh, GrandMother," giggled Hibbs. "You're so funny."

Estanatlehi smiled faint. "I do believe that you are the first to say that of me."

"Truly? Wheee! I'm the first. The very first. I bet I'm the first bear to explore this wonderful valley, too."

A thin arch of lightning rose skeptically over one turquoise eye. "Wonderful? I do believe that once again you are the first to call this valley that as well."

Hibbs did a hand-stand as he bounced around The Turquoise Woman. "What a day of firsts! It's great to be an explorer, isn't it?"

Estanatlehi sighed, "True, there is something to be said for heading into unexplored territory --- Uffff!"

Hibbs had collided into her side as he miscalculated his next hand-stand. She stopped suddenly and gestured.

The young cub froze upside down in mid-air. Twin turquoise eyes narrowed as she bent and placed her face right next to the face of the frightened bear.

"But there is also something to be said for knowing where you are going."

"Wanunhecun, (mistake in Lakota)," muttered Hibbs out of a dust dry throat.

Turquoise eyes narrowed further, and Hibbs managed to get out the one word, "S-Sorry."

Snow suddenly started to swirl around the upside-down cub. "Better."

Hibbs let out a sigh of relief. Of course, he had misunderstood her as he so often did. And The Turquoise Woman reached out and sharply tweaked his nose.

"N-Not better?"

Estanatlehi murmured in words of winter, "No. Not 'sorry.' But 'better.'"

Hibbs' eyes widened. "Oh, you mean -- don't be sorry. Be better."

Long ivory fingers gestrued gracefully, and the cub landed on his head. Hard. But Hibbs merely giggled and rolled to his feet, hugging the startled Turquoise Woman.

"Got it right that time didn't I, GrandMother?"

And feeling the warmth of the young cub's trusting embrace about her legs, Estanatlehi lost all her former anger. She reached down and gently ruffled the top of Hibbs's furry head. All the tension left her voice as she spoke.


Her eyes sparkled with something that rarely touched them -- amusement. "And no."

Hibbs looked up with such nose-wrinkling puzzlement that Estanatlehi had to laugh. "How can it be both 'yes' and 'no' at the same time, GrandMother?"

This time her fingers were gentle as she tweaked his nose. "Oh, Little One, sometimes it appears that your whole life is both 'Yes' and 'No.'"



She reached down and gently tugged on his small right ear. "Come, and I will show you."

Though he felt like he would burst from just simply plodding along, Hibbs forced himself to walk beside GrandMother.

His steps were so small compared to her long strides though that he happily found it was necessary to skip to keep up. Estanatlehi shook her head in wry amusement.

"This path is much different in summer than it is now in Autumn. These gentle slopes, so pleasant to walk upon in summer, turn slippery and dangerous with winter snows."

Hibbs squinted this way and that as he tried to imagine the trees and grass about him covered with the magic of first snowfall. The brittle leaves of Autumn tickled the bottom of his bare feet, and he fought a giggle.

A hawk cawed high overhead, and the young cub strained to make it out. But it flew high into the clouds too quickly for him to pick it out against the utter blue of the sky. And so his first meeting with Little Brother was postponed to the dark future.

Estanatlehi tugged a bit sharper on his ear to snare his ever-wandering attention. "Yet in winter, we could safely walk over this very spot where in summer rattlesnakes love to hide."

"Yikes!," squealed Hibbs, slamming hard into Estanatlehi's left leg as he leapt in fright from the imagined attack of slumbering rattlesnakes rudely awakened by scampering bear feet.

The Turquoise Woman sharply gestured with long ivory fingers, whose tips sizzled with sparks of black death.

Yelping in fear and surprise, Hibbs was lifted bodily high in the air by the threads of Life until his eyes stared unhappily straight into eyes which had blasted the very flesh from the bones of Lakota warriors foolish enough to anger her.

"Does the air feel like summer to you?"

"I know it is Autumn, but --"

Turquoise eyes narrowed dangerously. "Autumn. Not summer. So by my very words, you know you are safe."

Hibbs swallowed hard and managed to get out, "You wouldn't say that if you were on my side of your eyes."

Estanatlehi stiffened, then laughed long and deep. "Oh, Little One, whatever did I do before you?"

As he was lowered gently to the dry leaves, Hibbs rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. "Probably walked without getting your feet stepped on."

Her head cocked slightly, and long, cold fingers gently ruffled the fur on the top of his head. "But I never laughed. Never. I believe a bruised toe or two is a small price for me to pay."

She tugged sharp on his right ear. "Now, what have you learned from all this?"

Hibbs looked up lovingly into her face and wanted so hard not to see it grow cold again. He thought and thought and thought. The obvious answer would only raise storm clouds again. An eyebrow of living lightning rose slowly.

Snakes in summer. Slippery tumbles in winter. The same path. His furry brow wrinkled as his tiny eyes squinted in hard thought. His eyes suddenly widened, and he smiled big.

"Different seasons make for different paths, even on the same spot."

The eyebrow of lightning kept rising, and Hibbs stuttered, "U-Uh, and -- and --- I guess that means that no one walks the same path twice even though it is the same road."

Hibbs heaved a sigh of relief as Estanatlehi's full lips slowly smiled. "I believe the end of the world must be near."


Full lips struggled to be sober and lost. "It is written : there shall be plagues, floods, and famines. Little Hibbs will actually learn a lesson. Then shall the End come."

"Oh, GrandMother, you scared me."

She gently stroked the top of his head. "It is a natural talent."

Hibbs couldn't think of anything to say to that which wouldn't end up with him becoming even more scared, so he just hugged GrandMother's legs. Icy fingers patted his cheek. Hibbs smiled wide. For once, he had chosen the right path.

And abruptly, Hibbs was back in the present. And yes, he was still smiling but it was a sad smile, nonetheless, with echoes of loss and beckoning darkness. He looked to GrandMother and saw her lips twisting up in the same smile.

"The right path," he whispered.

Estanatlehi's hair of living lightning shivered as she nodded. "So you still remember?"

"I remember each of our walks, GrandMother."

His forehead wrinkled along with his nose as he said low,

"No one walks the same path twice -- even if it is the same road. Were you trying to tell me just now that even though I will walk the same unexplored territory as this other, I do not have to share his fate -- because I am different than he?"

Estanatlehi nodded even more slowly. "Yes ... and no."


  1. Hibbs is great. I hope you are still selling copies.

    Our good friend Donna is featured today on my blog.


  2. She likes to make him think, doesn't she?

  3. Awesome imagery: "Her head cocked slightly, and long, cold fingers gently ruffled the fur on the top of his head." Beautiful writing! :)

  4. That excerpt had me riveted. Love the playful little cub and his wise grandmother teaching him in the deliberate, metaphorical way only she can. The "yes" and "no" reminds me of dialectics, which we use at our group therapy center. Dialectics is the union of opposites--two opposing statements that are both true, joined by an "and" (not a "but"). It is yes AND it is no. Liked and tagged your story on Amazon!

  5. I love this exerpt! Hibbs is certainly one of my favorite characters.

  6. Hi Roland .. we can never tread the same path, nothing is ever the same, we might lessons along the way .. but the path is different.

    Loved this post - and reading the whole - wonderful imagery you conjure up ..

    Look after yourself .. cheers Hilary

  7. Denise:
    Hibbs thanks you. Sadly, his sales have come to a halt which is why I thanked those who did indeed buy his adventures. I have no hopes that ABNA will allow him to continue. But he is a scrapper. Hibbs may fool me yet. It is what he does!

    I am heading over to you and Donna now.

    Estanatlehi is a harsh teacher sometimes ... Mother Nature is sometimes like that!

    Thank you, Jack:
    May all this week bring you magic each day.

    Doesn't it seem that life insists in giving us circumstances that are both YES and NO. Sandra, my best friend who is also a counselor, hates when her clients say, "Yes, but ...." (A way of seemingly agreeing but stubbornly insisting on a dysfunctional path anyway!)

    So many of those around us live lives of painful cognitive dissonance. They try to reconcile the discomfort caused by holding conflicting ideas and world-views and trying to live one, while speaking another.

    Thank you so much for tagging THE BEAR WITH TWO SHADOWS on Amazon. It meant a lot to me.

    Thank you, Heather:
    Hibbs is one of my favorite characters. He's been a long time imaginary companion. Imaginary? Perhaps that shadow at the foot of my bed is really him visiting again.

    You brighten my day whenever you visit. Thank you for chatting whenever you visit! Roland

  8. Oh goodness, I love Hibbs. He draws me in and reminds me to bounce when I fall on my head. I hope you just keep selling and selling, you deserve to.
    All my love
    Laura x

  9. Thank you, Laura:
    I, too, need Hibbs' reminder to bounce when I fall on my head! LOL. You are nice to write such great words, Roland

  10. I like that: Don't be sorry, be better!

    There's your Yoda quote. Sorry be not. Be better, hrmmm.

    I enjoyed BWTS. The fire guy was particularly interesting and creative.

    - Eric

  11. Oh, I enjoyed that snippet, Roland. Such weighty truths presented in deceptively simple terms.


  12. Charming and profound. (=

    Finished Blood Will Tell. Liked it! Very cool concept. Like a Twilight Zone episode. (=

  13. Always so great to read your excerpts, Roland. Love the theme :D

  14. I am sometimes sad that I cannot go back down a familiar path. Turn the clock back and do it again. Great post.

  15. Eric:
    Thanks for liking Surt, Father of All Fires. I've often thought I saw a face when staring into a fireplace blazing. Hibbs gives you a big smile, too. Well, you know Little Brother!

    Yes, Estanatlehi was trying to pound some wisdom into young Hibbs' fuzzy brain. He tries so hard!

    I'm glad you liked BLOOD WILL TELL. A review would put your name in the contest that is still on-going!

    Your prize will be in the mail tomorrow. I drove 415 miles Easter Sunday and stayed up most of the night. I crashed today! Thanks for liking Hibbs. He likes you back, Roland

    I, too, have often wished I could back and turn back the clock, knowing what I know now. I would only make more mistakes, but my body would hurt less! :-)