So you can read my books

Wednesday, April 17, 2024



Benjamin Franklin is an undead agent for Abigail Adams in my THE NOT SO INNOCENTS ABROAD with Mark Twain and a host of other unsavory characters. 

“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.”
― Benjamin Franklin -- branded Outlaw by the King for aiding the Revolution.
1790 -- On this date, Benjamin Franklin died in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania at age 84. 
He took his own advice,

making many scientific discoveries, helping draft the Declaration of Independence, securing French economic and military aid during the Revolutionary War.
As an inventor, he is known for the lightning rod, bifocals, and the Franklin stove, among other inventions.  

He facilitated many civic organizations, including Philadelphia's fire department and a university.
1894 -- On this date Nikita Khrushchev was born:
"Politicians are the same the world over.  They promise to build a bridge even when there is no river." 

1885 -- Karen Blixen (Isak Dinesen) was born on this day in Rungsted, Denmark.  She had such determined pride that many in Africa addressed her as "Lioness" rather than Baroness.


 The result was one of the most adventurous lives in modern literature --

Here is an excerpt from her writings:
"The family of Finch Hatton, of England, have on their crest the device Je responderay, “I will answer.” …

I liked it so much I asked Denys … if I might have it for my own.
He generously made me a present of it and even had a seal cut for me, with the words carved on it. The device was meaningful and dear to me for many reasons, two in particular.
The first was its high evaluation of the idea of the answer in itself.
For an answer is a rarer thing than is generally imagined.

There are many highly intelligent people who have no answer at all in them.

 Secondly, I liked the Finch Hatton device for its ethical content.

 I will answer for what I say or do; I will answer to the impression I make. I will be responsible."
 {Wolf Howl quotes this passage to his preternatural students in END OF DAYS.} 

I pick O to stand for that grand lady, Flannery O'Connor, who wrote:

“The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.”

On this day, in 1970 the severely damaged Apollo 13 spacecraft returns safely to Earth 4 days after an explosion aborted its mission to land on the moon.

Monday, April 15, 2024



There are Outlaws that deserve to be hanged.  Ask ...

Bat Masterson
Bat Masterson 1879.jpg

"There are many of us in this old world of ours who hold that things break
about even for all of us.

I have observed, for example, that we all get about the same amount of ice.

The rich get it in the summer, and the poor get it in the winter."

                           -- Bat Masterson

1178 B.C
The eclipse mentioned in Homer's Odyssey occurs on this day.

 -- On this day, 5,000 valiant Highlanders fought the Duke of Cumberland in the last battle fought in Great Britain.

A few stanzas from Robert Burns's "Ye Jacobites By Name," a traditional and pro-James ballad which Burns turns into a protest against war:

"What is right and what is wrong
By short sword or by long
A weak arm or a strong for to draw

 What makes heroic strife famed afar
 To whet the assassain's knife
Or haunt a parent's life wi' bloody war….

 -- On this date on the streets of Dodge City, lawman Bat Masterson fought the last gun battle of his life.  He turned to newspaper work.  He died at his desk in 1921 in New York City.

{Seeking copy in Gunnison, Colorado, a reporter asked Dr W.S. Cockrell about mankillers.

Dr. Cockrell pointed to a young man nearby and said it was Bat Masterson and that he had killed 26 men.

 Cockrell then regaled the reporter with several lurid tales about Bat's exploits and the reporter wrote them up for the New York Sun.

The story was then widely reprinted in papers all over the country and became the basis for many more exaggerated stories told about Bat over the years.}

 --  On this day, Albert Hoffman, accidently ingests LSD-25 in his medical research, becoming the world's first LSD "Tripper."

 -- This day, former Auschwitz commandant, Rudolph Hoss, is hanged at Auschwitz. 

In his memoirs was found this written statement: "History will mark me as the greatest mass murderer of all time."

 -- This day, Apollo 16 lifts off for the moon.

2009 -- On this day, President Obama ruled out prosecutions against those C.I.A. operatives 

who participated in the torture of terrorists suspects at the Guantánamo Bay and other secret detention centers.

N stands for Friedrich NIETZSCHE:

#1 Nietzsche was a failure during his lifetime

Nietzsche achieved the impressive feat of becoming a professor by the age of 24.

However, he was alienated by his peers and forced to retire by the age of 35.

Nietzsche also wanted to abandon philosophy in favor of gardening.

It wasn’t until after his death that Nietzche’s work began to be read widely.

#2 His mustache frightened women

Nietzsche was sadly incompetent at romance. Apparently, Nietzsche’s epic mustache “scared” women at the time.

 And that’s probably for the better, because Nietzsche also managed to contract syphilis at a brothel while he was still in college.

#3 He had a mental breakdown when he saw a horse being beaten

After seeing a horse being whipped in the streets of Turin, Italy, Nietzsche had a mental breakdown that put him in an asylum for the rest of his life.

Nietzsche is reported to have run over to the horse and held it in his arms to protect it before he collapsed to the ground.

The scene was also the subject of a movie by Bela Tarr (whom Jacques Ranciere wrote a book about)

called The Turin Horse.

After the horse incident Nietzsche returned to his boarding house.

 In the following few days, Nietzsche sent short writings—known as the Wahnbriefe ("Madness Letters")—to a number of friends.

Nietzsche commanded the German emperor to go to Rome to be shot

and summoned the European powers to take military action against Germany.

Nietzsche’s mother, Franziska, first placed in a clinic, and then dissatified with his treatment, brought him to her home in Naumburg.

After the death of Franziska in 1897, Nietzsche lived in Weimar,

where Elisabeth, his sister,  cared for him and allowed visitors to meet her uncommunicative brother.

After contracting pneumonia in mid-August 1900, he had a stroke during the night of 24–25 August and died at about noon on 25 August.

“I'm not upset that you lied to me.  I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche


RMS Titanic 3.jpg
RMS Titanic departing Southampton on 10 April 1912


This is the date when the IRS become Outlaws.  :-)

On this date in 1861 -- Abraham Lincoln, expecting the Civil War to be a short conflict, calls for only 75,000 volunteers to serve for 3 months.

On this date in 1865 -- Abraham Lincoln dies from the bullet wound inflicted by John Wilkes Booth, six days after Lee surrendered at Appomattox.

In an alternate universe, he survives, though his wife does not --- for which he blames the Texas Ranger, Samuel McCord --

sending him on a lifelong quest for revenge.

The RMS Titanic went down 112 years ago today.  Though polished by a century of narratives, the tragedy retains its impact in the eyewitness records:

(Notice how tiny the man appears at the bottom of the rudder.)

An account dictated to the New York Times by the Titanic’s twenty-two-year-old junior wireless operator, Harold Bride:

Bride’s description begins in humor, he and the senior wireless operator cracking jokes about the mishap.

Then the bow tilts, the “great scramble aft” begins, and Phillips, the senior man, begins hours of urgent messaging:

"He was a brave man. I learned to love him that night, and I suddenly felt for him a great reverence to see him standing there sticking to his work while everybody was raging about….

…I saw a stoker leaning over Phillips from behind. He was too busy to notice what the stoker was doing. The man was slipping the lifebelt off Phillips’s back. I suddenly felt a passion not to let that man die a decent sailor’s death.

I wished he might have stretched rope or walked a plank. I took a lead pipe and did my duty. I hope I finished him. I don’t know."

Then chaos:
The Captain giving the ‘abandon ship,’
Phillips refusing to leave his post,
Bride jumping, eventually being rescued,
And helping to hand up from the floor of his life-raft the body of a dead sailor — Phillips. 

Just in 2013 -- those terrible bombings at the Boston Marathon.

2014 -- Total Lunar Eclipse. This year we missed matching it by only a few days.

1923 -- Insulin became widely available. Insulin had only been proven to work the year before; before that, diabetes was essentially a death sentence, especially for children. 

1955 -- Ray Kroc opened the first McDonald's restaurant in Des Plaines, Illinois, on this day.

Within five years, there were over 100 McDonald's in the US, and less than 20 years later the company passed the $1 billion US Dollars (USD) profit mark. 

1942 -- The George Cross is the highest civil award given in the United Kingdom, and is rarely awarded.

The island of Malta and all its residents were awarded the George Cross because of their behavior during a long-term siege in World War II,

and the cross is now sewn into the Maltan flag.

The "Oliver Twist" of my SAME AS IT NEVER WAS is awarded it by King George himself:

M could stand for Christopher Moore:

“If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.”   

  ― Christopher Moore, 
Practical Demonkeeping    

M could stand for John D MacDonald

"The only thing in the world worth a damn is the strange, touching, pathetic, awesome nobility of the individual human spirit."


Saturday, April 13, 2024



"As you have seen, I am a writer who came of a sheltered life. A sheltered life can be a daring life as well.  
For all serious daring starts from within."
 (The concluding sentences of One Writer’s Beginnings, by Eudora Welty, born on this day in 1909.)

Eudora Welty would find it amusing that the first elephant arrived in America on this date in 1796.

 She would not find its fate amusing at all:

The elephant, named Old Bet, was brought back from India to America by a sea captain who hoped to sell her.

Old Bet was eventually bought by Hackaliah Bailey, one of the founders of Barnum and Bailey, and stayed with the circus

 until she was shot and killed by a boy who had heard that her hide was bulletproof, and wanted to see if it was true.

Mankind is often not very kind, but it can be sparked to do the right thing for the wrong reason:

On this day in 1360 a massive hail killed British troops in France.  

A massive hailstorm killed over 1,000 British troops fighting in the Hundred Year's War in France.

The hailstorm was seen as a divine sign, and the King of England negotiated with peace for France. 

Was Eudora Welty an Outlaw

In Meilori's, her ghost deals off the bottom of the deck when playing poker with the ghost of Mark Twain.

But that scoundrel cheats, too!

Consider the following images of the woman generally deemed to be the finest Southern short-story writer of the 20th century:

Eudora Welty nightclub-hopping until all hours in Paris and New York.

Or paying visits to her "feather-boa-ed bootlegger" in her hometown, Jackson, Miss.

Or enjoying nighttime skinny-dipping in a friend's swimming pool.

Eudora Welty, decades later, venturing off to see "A Hard Day's Night."

Or writing to a friend to complain, "Oh, God! I had to meet Pres. Nixon!"

Eudora Welty, at age 70, visiting friends with whom she "danced and cavorted." 

None of this quite tallies with the image the reading public had of Welty in her later years as "the Benign and Beamish Maiden Aunt of American Letters"

(as her friend Reynolds Price tartly put it).

It underscores the adventurous nature of Welty's life and notes the frustration she felt when her independent spirit was constrained by family duty.

It draws plausible links between the dramas of her life and the vigor of her fiction.

It also makes clear that Welty's decision to stay in Jackson, Miss., even during its tensest racial conflicts,

wasn't an act of complacency but one of endurance,

during which she did what she could — while caring for her ailing mother — to help create a multi-racial, liberal oasis in Jackson. 

And there was Kenneth Millar (the real name of thriller-writer Ross Macdonald),

with whom Welty had an intense long-distance affair punctuated with occasional visits in the flesh.

Whether it was a sexual affair or not remains uncertain — but it was enough to trigger jealous reactions from Millar's wife. 

Her father had died when she was 21; the rest of her immediate family — mother, two brothers — were gone by the time she was 56.

The life-loving Welty cherished her friends and used lecture opportunities and fellowships to see as much of them as she could. Hence all the travel.

Still there is mystery to Eudora since all her correspondence with her mother is sealed until 2025

“We are the breakers of our own hearts”
― Eudora Welty


Friday, April 12, 2024



"I would rather be right than president."
- Henry Clay -- who was born on this date in 1777.

In the theme that to be an outlaw is not always to be rich:

On this day in 1857, Gustave Flaubert's Madame Bovary was published. 

The serialization of the novel in the Revue de Paris the previous winter earned Flaubert almost nothing

and generated one of the most famous literary trials in French history.

It also made the author's reputation and vindicated a new style of writing based on the attempt to portray "ignoble reality."

The impish author, Chrys Fey, was born on this day.  What year you ask?  Silly rabbit, you never ask what year a fae was born!

The ghost of Ogden Nash has written a birthday verse for Chrys: 

"As through the calendar I delve
I pause to rejoice in April twelve.
Yea, be I in sickness or be I in health
My favorite date is April twealth.     

     It comes upon us, as a rule,
Eleven days after April fool,
And eighteen days ahead of May Day,
When spring is generally in its heyday.

     Down in New Mexico the chapparal
Is doing nicely by the twelfth of Apparal,
And Bay State towns such as Lowell and Pepperell
Begin to bloom on the twelfth of Epperell.

     But regardless of the matter of weather,
There isn't any question whether.
No, not till the trumpet is blown by Gabriel
Shall we have such a day as the twelfth of Abriel."
- Ogden Nash ("Lines in Praise of a Date Made Praiseworthy Solely by Something Very Nice That Happened to It")

The beginning and ending of the American Civil War

(the 4 bloodiest years in American history)

 is tied to this week —

the opening shots fired at Fort Sumter on this day in 1861

General Robert E. Lee surrendering to General Ulysses Grant at Appomattox on April 9, 1865.

1633 -- Galileo was convicted of heresy. 

Foundational scientist and astronomer Galileo was convicted of heresy because he refused to recant his statement that the Earth revolved around the sun, instead of vice versa.

He spent the rest of his life under house arrest.  Sometimes being an outlaw is no fun at all!


1945 -- President Franklin Roosevelt died on this date. 

 Roosevelt died while on vacation, leaving Truman to take over.

Though sometimes controversial, he had brought America through the Great Depression and World War II,

and was one of the most influential presidents.

My hero, Major Richard Blaine, gate-crashed one of his infamous Children Hours get-togethers in a chapter of SAME AS IT NEVER WAS

1954 -- on this day Bill Haley and the Comets recorded Rock Around the Clock:

Often called the first rock and roll record, Rock Around the Clock

became sensationally popular after it was used as the opening song in Blackboard Jungle,

and sold more than 1 million records in one month in 1955 alone.

1981 -- The first space shuttle was launched.  

The Columbia, the first reusable manned spacecraft, was launched for the first time on this day.

It was a major step forward for NASA, and was eventually used to help build the International Space Station. 

Tom Clancy was born on this day in 1947.

In 1984, the Naval Institute Press paid Tom Clancy an advance of $5,000 for The Hunt for Red October

There matters might have rested, except that someone handed a copy to the Fortieth President, who (then at the zenith of his great parabola) gave it an unoriginal but unequivocal blurb.

“The perfect yarn,” he said, and the Baltimore insurance agent was on his way to blockbuster authorship.

I say K represents KAFKA -- 

On JULY 3,1883, Franz Kafka was born in Prague.

Few writers have been so closely linked to their home and city, or made so much from it, as Kafka.

But for the months spent in sanitariums and a half-year with a girlfriend, and despite the psychological torture it inflicted, he lived at home with his parents all his life:

“Many a book is like a key to unknown chambers within the castle of one’s own self.”

“A book must be the axe for the frozen sea within us.”

“Youth is happy because it has the capacity to see beauty. Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old.”

― Franz Kafka

Thursday, April 11, 2024



Thanks for all the concerned emails about the tornado that tore through his town yesterday.
“Don't look at me in that tone of voice.”
― Dorothy Parker

Ghost of Dorthoy Parker here --

On this day in 1931, I stepped down as drama critic for The New Yorker,

so ending the "Reign of Terror" I endured while reviewing plays, and that others endured while being reviewed by me.

Altogether I was a drama critic for only a half-dozen years in a 50-year career, 

My Broadway days brought me first fame and occasioned some of my most memorable lines according to that flirt Twain:

“If you don't knit, bring a book."

"I'm not including names in this review, for I don't want to tell on them."

"Katharine Hepburn's striking performance ran the gamut of emotions from A to B."

On the use of “hummy” for “honey” in A.A. Milne’s The House at Pooh Corner:

“It is that word ‘hummy,’ my darlings, that marks the first place in The House at Pooh Corner at which Tonstant Weader Fwowed up.”

"There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit.

Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words." 

After Hemingway swaggered the reins of this electronic journal in GHOST OF A CHANCE, I thought to pluck them back for Roland.

You see Hemingway knows better than to box with me, for I dated him just long enough to see he wasn't a leopard ---

he just had liver spots.

I even wrote a poem of us:

"Little drops of grain alcohol
Little slugs of gin
Make the mighty notions
Make the double chin --

Lovely Mrs. Parker in the Algonquin
Loves her good dog Robinson
Keeps away from sin
Mr. Hemingway now wears glasses
Better to see to kiss the critics' asses."

On a sadder note, fitting more with noble outcast than outlaw: 

The Hungarian novelist Sándor Márai was born on this day in 1900.

Fiercely anti-Nazi and anti-Communist, Márai fled Hungary in 1948 and refused to allow his work to be published there under any Communist regime:

"The human night is filled with the crouching forms of dreams, desires, vanities, self-interest, mad love, envy, and the thirst for revenge." 

1905 --   Albert Einstein published his special theory of relativity.

The revolutionary theory was first published in "Annalen der Physik," a major physics journal.

And if you expect me to say that title aloud, darling, you are going to have to get me drunk first!

The theory immediately rocked the scientific community, and is said to be the basis of modern physics.

 Abraham Lincoln made his last public speech.

   Lincoln's last speech centered on promoting the rights of African-Americans.

After hearing it, John Wilkes Booth, who had originally been planning to kidnap Lincoln,

was so angry that he decided to assassinate him instead.

So sad.  The pooled compassion of zealots wouldn't fill a teaspoon.

And their pooled common sense wouldn't fill an atom.

 -- The last sentence of death for witchcraft was passed in Germany.

Witchcraft remained punishable by death in many countries around the world throughout the 18th century,

though Germany and Switzerland were among the last two European countries to sentence suspected witches to death.

By the 21st century, the only country where witchcraft was still punishable by death was Saudi Arabia.

Ah, my poor sister witches:

          I am sister to the rain;
          Fey and sudden and unholy,
          Petulant at the windowpane,
          Quickly lost, remembered slowly.
First printed in New Yorker, (26 September 1926)

Apollo 13
 on this day in 1970 launched to Moon; unable to land, returns in
 6 days.

Reminds me of many a night on the town for me:

I wish I could drink like a lady.
“Two or three,” at the most.

But two, and I’m under the table—
And three, I'm under the host.

Now, on to my oft drinking buddy, under whose photo I wrote this caption --

"Brevity is the soul of lingerie."

"I am at heart a gentleman."
- Marlene Dietrich

On this date in 1942, Marlene Dietrich gave the first of many shows overseas for U.S. servicemen,

earning a death sentence from Adolph Hitler and the Medal of Freedom from America and the French Legion of Honor.

And providing a pivotal plot point in Roland's GHOST OF A CHANCE:

J represents William JAMES --

(not his brother, Henry James who renounced his citizenship in disgust at America. Washing your hands of a problem does not solve it, my dear.)

William James is considered the Father of American Psychology:

J represents William JAMES --

(not his brother, Henry James who renounced his citizenship in disgust at America. Washing your hands of a problem does not solve it, my dear.)

William James is considered the Father of American Psychology:

“We may be in the Universe as dogs and cats are in our libraries,

seeing the books and hearing the conversation, but having no inkling of the meaning of it all.”