WHAT WOULD THE PEOPLE OF THE WORLD BE WITHOUT WOMEN?

What would the people of the world be without women?  

They would be scarce, folks, almighty scarce. 

- Mark Twain

Ghost of Mark Twain here.

On this International Day of Women, I am moved to speak ...

Human intelligence cannot estimate what we owe to Woman. 

She sews our buttons, mends our clothes, ropes us in at the church fairs --

 She confides in us; she tells us whatever she can find out about the little private affairs of the neighbors -- 

she gives us good advice, and plenty of it -- she gives us a piece of her mind, and sometimes all of it.

She soothes our aching brows -- she bears our children . 

 In all the relations of life, folks, it is but just, and a graceful tribute to woman to say of her that she is a jewel. 

I know that since the ladies started out on their crusades, they have scored in every project they undertook against unjust laws. 

I would like to see them help make the laws and become those who are enforce them. 

I would like to see the whiplash in women's hands. 

Lord knows that the men have certainly mucked up things for quite long enough.

Now, some of these gals nowadays do give me pause.  

Why I never thought I would see places sunburned on them in public

that I only dreamed about when alive!

Riverboat pilot, Western correspondent, silver prospector, and world traveler, 

I must seem the quintessential man's man. 

But to that I say NO!  (Contrary soul that I am).

I was a writer who intentionally surrounded myself with women, 

a writer whose capacity to produce fiction had almost as much to do 

with the environment shaped by my female family and associates as with my own talent and genius.

What?  You expected humility from me!?