XENOMORPH Blues _ A TO Z

{Courtesy Dave Melvin}

“When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.”
― Gypsy, Ghost Cat

So there I was watching the rolling credits to ALIEN, thinking what a great human Ripley was for going back for her cat.

I was curled up in Food Guy's favorite chair.  He wasn't using it.  He was out on one of those blood runs of his.

Why do I still call him Food Guy when I can't eat?  He still puts out food for me to knock around the kitchen floor.

I coulda won the World Cup for America if they just accepted ghost cats.

I went cold as I heard hollow laughter.  

Aw, mouse turds.  

That DayStar Guy. 

Why couldn't he pick on someone his own size -- like the Statue of Liberty?

It came from the kitchen.  I padded all ninja-like to peek around the corner.  Aw, jeez.  An honest-to-acid blood Alien.

And it was drooling all over my food!

I charged it, hissing.  It hissed back.  I hissed louder, bucking my back to boot. 

"Lay off my food, Drool Lips!"

Its inner teeth shot out at me, and I dodged.

"Hey, no French Kissing on the first date!"

It lunged for me.  I twisted and ran into the front room.  It followed. 

I stopped in front of the mirror, spun around, and wiggled my rear in its face.

"Hey, Ugly!  I wear mine on the right end!"

Like I figured, the Alien darted for me.

I yelled out, "Elu, don't fail me now!!"

Elu? 

He lives in what he calls the Mirror World.  I saved his life once from the Sphinx of Thebes, and the Apache Shaman owes me.

I hoped he wouldn't welch on the debt.

Elu didn't. 

The alien slid right THROUGH the mirror.  I followed.  Maybe I could convince the Dildo-Headed Alien to be pals. 

Hey, it could happen!

{Courtesy Dave Melvin}

“Why isn’t the word “phonetically”

spelled with an “f”?”

  ―     Gypsy, Ghost Cat