So you can read my books

Wednesday, January 22, 2014


My favorite Viktor Vasnetsov painting is his A KNIGHT AT THE CROSSROADS.

I study it when at a personal crossroads ... as tonight.

Two growths on my face the doctors are 99% certain are cancerous. 

The biopsy reports will not be in until next week sometime.  Days will be longer than usual now. 

I face surgeries I cannot afford four weeks from now (the earliest they can work me in.)

My company's new insurance has a new deductible of $2500 at a time when I depleted my savings to save my cat.

Anyone can be a hero when the odds are in their favor. 

I will find a way, for the Father has never let me down yet as my home burning down and Hurricane Rita proved.

I was just going to post as if nothing were wrong, but the more perceptive of you would have noticed and thought perhaps it was me feeling hostility towards you, my friends.

So I am being upfront with you.

So I am working with a time bomb ticking each second, not knowing just what is going to happen. 

Mohs Surgery takes off one layer of skin at a time, but these growths have been with me for years.

How many layers will have to be removed?  Will it be enough?

The night has descended. There is no moon, and I cannot see the stars.  That is what faith and courage is all about.

As I waited for the doctor in the office today, I picked up the Gideon Bible to look for the 23rd Psalm, and it fell open to Psalm 91,

letting me know that others have been in the same place as I ... and The Father was standing next to them as He was standing next to me.

And so that is that.  No more whining from me. 

I will try to be entertaining with my future posts.  I just ask that if you believe, pray for me ... and for the countless others who have no one to listen or pray for them.
“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”
C.G. Jung


  1. You certainly have my support. This is one of those life stages, and as usual, there are no signposts.

    We'll listen. If you want to talk.

  2. I am not a believer, but you and the faceless many have a place in my heart, thoughts and wishes.
    If you can, keep us posted.

  3. My healing thoughts are being sent your way.

  4. I will be praying for you, my friend. God will not let you face this alone.
    What can we do to help?

  5. D.G.:
    No one wants to read doom and gloom. I was just letting my friends know what was up if they detected something off in my posts. My next posts will be light and breezy -- what folks want to read as they blog surf.

    Thanks for being there for me. :-)

    Elephant's Child:
    You believe in compassion, caring, and empathy -- labels are just that: labels. It is what you do that determines who you are. :-)

    Thanks for thinking of those hurting others in the shadows. Thanks for your friendship.

    Your words mean a lot to me. Thank you.

    Even were I standing in the darkness alone -- I would not be alone, for The Father's arm would be around me.

    Thank you for your prayers. They mean a lot to me.

    Even if folks bought enough of my audiobooks to put me in the Top 20, it would not be enough money.

    Just pray and let my other friends you know that I could use a prayer or two. My times are in The Father's Hand. Thank you again. :-)

  6. Oh no. I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope everything goes well, that the time bomb is safely defused.

  7. J E:
    The Father is the ultimate Bomb Squad. :-) Thanks for being concerned.

  8. I'll be thinking of you. I hope you find the strength to get through this, and that all will soon be well.

  9. Dear Roland, we've had very few correspondences, but I'm tearful now. I'm so sorry. I know that your heart, strength, will and talents are incredibly immense. You are truly special. We are here for you, always. Don't feel that you have to bring on the cheer for anyone's sake. We want your genuine self. Can we help with donations? Lean on your friends. You are deeply loved.
    You'll be in my nightly prayers.

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  11. I had mohs surgery two years ago. The growth was on my nose very close to my eye. The surgeon was able to successfully remove it after several attempts. Because there was scar tissue from a previous growth, he had to take a skin graft from behind my ear. The whole procedure was only slightly uncomfortable Sometimes it helps to know what to expect. Roland, I wish you all the best, and will keep you in my prayers.


  12. I'm thinking about you.

    You'll be okay.

    Stay positive. Stay healthy.

    Take extra good care of yourself.


  13. Thoughts and prayers for you. Just stay positive. Your attitude is all you can control right now.

  14. I've had friends go through similar surgeries. It's never easy. After reading your post, I can tell God is with you. My heart and prayers are also with you.

  15. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Have faith! The most miraculous things are being accomplished these days with cancer treatments.

  16. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Odds are, the growths only became cancerous recently and so all of it will be removed. But what you're going through is still scary, so don't hesitate to lean on your readers -- we're here for you.

  17. L.G.:
    With the support of friends like you, I will find the strength to take the next step. Thank you.

    Your words are lights in the darkness for me. Thank you. I could not ask for money from my friends. I am humbled by friends like yourself.

    Your prayers mean a lot to me. You might mention my book, DEATH IN THE HOUSE OF LIFE, on your blog. If it is Sam's last adventure, I would like it to be seen by a few folks.

    Empty Nest Insider:
    Thank you for telling me about your own surgery. One of my growths is on the tip of my nose, fairly large.

    A co-worker said her uncle had MOHS surgery in the same place and afterwards looked like the Elephant Man. Sigh.

    Your words helped counter that bit of sunshine. Thank you for keeping me in your prayers.

    I'm trying to get more sleep. But weekends are hard on me: working 24 hrs out of 48, driving 500 miles, and getting 6 hrs. sleep both days doesn't help!!

    But your prayers and support helps.

    L. Diane:
    As William James wrote: the attitude we possess at the start of a trial is the most important aspect in it succeeding. Thanks for being there for me. :-)

    I try to focus on all the times the Father has pulled me through before. An ice storm is hitting us now so everything is delayed. I have notified that both spots are basal cell.

    Remember me in your prayers.

    Good things are said mostly of MOHS surgery. And the Father has never left me in the lurch. Thanks for being here for me.

    Your works and concern mean a lot to me. Keep me in your prayers. You made tonight easier on me. :-)

  18. Will do, and I'm adding that book to my list too. I'm tearful again, and have been sending strength, love, prayers, and healing thoughts.

    Be lifted by all who love you and are pulling for you.

  19. Robyn:
    Your post this morning meant the world to me. I am uplifted by your friendship. Now, I have to survive icy roads at night delievering rare blood! Where is Scotty and his transporter when you need them? :-)

    Ah, I could use Bones right about now, too, couldn't I?

  20. My prayers are with you, Roland. If there's anything you need, don't hesitate to ask! {{hugs}}