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Tuesday, July 22, 2014

GYPSY, ghost cat VS ALIEN!

{Courtesy Dave Melvin}
“When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.”
Gypsy, Ghost Cat
So there I was watching the rolling credits to ALIEN, thinking what a great human Ripley was for going back for her cat.
I was curled up in Food Guy's favorite chair.  He wasn't using it.  He was out on one of those blood runs of his.
Why do I still call him Food Guy when I can't eat?  He still puts out food for me to knock around the kitchen floor.
I coulda won the World Cup for America if they just accepted ghost cats.
I went cold as I heard hollow laughter.  Aw, mouse turds.  That DayStar Guy. 
Why couldn't he pick on someone his own size -- like the Statue of Liberty?
It came from the kitchen.  I padded all ninja-like to peek around the corner.  Aw, jeez.  An honest-to-acid blood Alien.
And it was drooling all over my food!
I charged it, hissing.  It hissed back.  I hissed louder, bucking my back to boot. 
"Lay off my food, Drool Lips!"
Its inner teeth shot out at me, and I dodged.
"Hey, no French Kissing on the first date!"
It lunged for me.  I twisted and ran into the front room.  It followed. 
I stopped in front of the mirror, spun around, and wiggled my rear in its face.
"Hey, Ugly!  I wear mine on the right end!"
Like I figured, the Alien darted for me.
I yelled out, "Elu, don't fail me now!!"
He lives in what he calls the Mirror World.  I saved his life once from the Sphinx of Thebes, and the Apache Shaman owes me.
I hoped he wouldn't welch on the debt.
Elu didn't. 
The alien slid right THROUGH the mirror.  I followed.  Maybe I could convince the Dildo-Headed Alien to be pals. 
Hey, it could happen!
{Courtesy Dave Melvin}
Why isn’t the word “phonetically”
spelled with an “f”?”
―     Gypsy, Ghost Cat


  1. Not a fan of Alien movies. I agree with Gypsy, I don't like their looks or their propagation methods.

    Good to know Elu can be counted on. Can he devour aliens?

  2. D.G.:
    He's Elu -- there's not much beyond him. :-)

    Never drool on Gypsy's food even if she can't eat it! I hope you enjoyed the flash fiction.

    I pray your husband is growing stronger and one day things will be close to normal once again.

  3. Underestimating a cat (including a ghost cat) is a very, very foolish mistake. Drooling on their food? A crime. Which WILL be punished.

  4. Elephant's Child:
    The Alien learned that the hard way! No drooling on the food - even if the cat doesn't want it!

    I'm glad you enjoyed Gypsy's latest ghost adventure. :-)

  5. Gypsy and the Alien prancing together is hilarious!

  6. Alex:
    What can I tell you? Gypsy has a wild imagination. But what can you expect from a ghost cat?