So you can read my books

Saturday, May 10, 2014


It will be Mother's Day tomorrow. 

My own mother's spirit has long since traveled to that Land which knows no shadow. 

I know she waits for me there with Sooner, 

the wolf-dog that once roamed the hills with Mother when she was a young girl.

When Mother visited the harsh home from which she had been taken to spend years in an orphanage, 

she was surprised her beloved Sooner was still alive. No other human could approach her.

But when Mother kneeled in front of her, Sooner laid her big head in Mother's lap. 

The wolf-dog finally felt the soft fingers stroke her that she had waited years to feel again. Sooner let out a long, slow sigh. And then, 

she died.

In my worldview, Sooner went to where she sat in that Land Of No Shadows with wagging tail 

until Mother walked up to her to kneel once again and hug that big head.

But I am a dinosaur ...

     It is current thinking in many universities that --


   In fact, motherhood is to blame for many of society's flaws.

Several university studies indicate it is time to drop the slogan. 

It encourages mothers to stay socially and financially hobbled,

 it alienates fathers and discourages other significant relationships between children and adults.

The studies state that the deification of mothers not only

 de-legitimises the relationship fathers, neighbors, friends, grandparents, teachers and carers have with children, 

it also diminishes the immense worth and value of these relationships.

The studies' summation started to rant on the effect of motherhood on gay fathers, and that is when I started to get a headache. 

I started to feel like a cultural dinosaur when I stumbled on several other studies that praise the effects of good mothers.


What do I think of mothers?

MOTHER is not a noun it is a verb.

Mothers are forgiving—so forgive her in return. 

Perhaps nothing will be as valuable a gift to both of you as forgiveness. 

Open your heart and drop your resentments. Now that’s love.


Her boundaries made you a better person. 

You may not have liked some of her decisions, especially when you wanted to party with your friends, but she did keep you out of trouble.

 Look at some of your friends without a mom who has cared that much.

My own mother was a single mother: half Lakota, half Irish.  And she was accepted by neither.  We were alone, yet never lonely.

I knew that as long as there was breath in my mother's body, I would have a champion. 

In a very real sense, Mother sang my life into being.

To Sing Life Into Being:

My half-Lakota mother would take me on long walks at night,

pointing to the stars and telling me tales

of long ago when life was blinking-eye fresh

and animals could talk.

That is where THE BEAR WITH TWO SHADOWS comes from.

She would always start those walks by pointing to the many-eyed blanket of night and say,

"The Great Mystery sang those stars to life, Little One. What words do you suppose He used?"

Perhaps that is why you and I sing life into being with our prose --

we carry that need to create we inherited from He whose song
spoke us to life.

What things are you grateful that your mother taught you?


  1. My relationship with my mother was complicated. For many years she was the person I hoped to become. Then she descended into alcoholism, and became someone I hope never to become.
    However, she did give me a love of reading - and I thank her for it everyday. And she gave me the most fundamental gift - life.

  2. My mother taught me drawing, reading, compassion, and a love of photography, of animals, of life,. . .

    From each person we meet, we take away one lesson, and from some we take several.

  3. My mom's mental illness taught me to survive.

  4. Elephant's Child:
    Life can cause us to dead yet while alive in so many ways. Alcoholism is one way. My father, too, was an alcoholic -- and a happy drunk he was not. Father's Day could have become a mockery for me if I did not have in my worldview the Heavenly Father.

    The love of reading is what your mother, Elephant's Child's and mine taught us.

    What lessons are our own lives teaching others without our knowing it?

    I am so sorry your mother's mental illness grieved you and taught you strength through sorrow. :-(

  5. You were blessed with the mother you were given to guide you in your life. I was too. I never had any conflicts with mine (that may be an American thing), we would sit and talk over hot chocolate and French buns every day after school. My mother was dealt some bad blows in life, but she had strength and will to overcome. My mother taught me to love. Is there a greater gift than that?

  6. Inger:
    I was beginning to feel guilty writing of my mother's love since so many of my visiting friends did not have such a thing -- but instead had a wounding relationship. In fact, I wrote a new post to help my bruised friends.

    I am glad you had such a loving mother. Talking over hot chocolate seems wonderful to me. :-)

    And being taught to love is a priceless gift.