WHAT'S UNAMERICAN THESE DAYS ANYHOW? Ghost of Mark Twain

 

What is unAmerican these days, anyhow?

Waiting for Roland to get back from a blood run,

I read where this singer gal

said we needed a new flag.

This present one was as bad

 as the Confederate Flag!

Well, thousands of soldiers died under that "unsuitable"

one to free a lot of folks from slavery.

But what do I know?

I'm just a humorist and 

actually lived during those times.

Then, there this here athlete who found something

better to do while they played the National Anthem.

Said she was set up and all.

Well, I didn't see anybody 

twisting her body around.

Does she know the story 

behind the song?

Would she care if she did?

Let's talk about the 4th of July:

 We have a double Fourth of July, a daylight Fourth 

and a midnight Fourth.

 

 During the day in America, as the President has indicated, 

we keep the Fourth of July properly in a reverent spirit.

 

We devote it to teaching our children patriotic things, 

and reverence for the Declaration of Independence.

 

We honor the day all through the daylight hours, 

and when night comes we dishonor it.

 

Two hours from now on the Atlantic coast when night shuts down, 

that pandemonium will begin 

and there will be noise, 

and noise, and noise, all night long,

 

And there will be more than noise --

 

There will be people crippled,

 there will be people killed, 

there will be people who will lose their eyes, 

and all through that permission which we give 

to irresponsible boys to play with firearms 

and firecrackers and all sorts of dangerous things.

 

We turn that Fourth of July over to rowdies to drink 

and get drunk and make the night hideous,

 and we cripple and kill more people 

than you would imagine.

 STAY SAFE THIS FOURTH, PILGRIMS!