So you can read my books

Thursday, July 4, 2013



The date resonates with the images of
freedom and fireworks.
But in this troubled land, FREE has many meanings ...


The fireworks were spectacular.

That was my word for the day. Spectacular. I had another word picked for tonight.


Mama told me sitting on this sil was dangerous. I could fall off and kill myself. That was funny and sad at the same time.

Funny in that my window being so high above the other apartment buildings made for a …

spectacular view of these fiery (that had been last night’s word) comets going off so bright in the darkness.

Sad in that there were worse things than dying. I flinched as I heard Mama’s boyfriend yell louder just beyond my door where Mama stood.

Yeah, there was living.

At first, she just cried when Dr. Doom, as I called her boyfriend, started … visiting my room late at night.

When I started to walk funny, she seemed to find courage from somewhere and tried to stop him.

Not that it worked. He was bigger and meaner than Mama.


That was a big cloud of fireworks. It seemed to just spread out across the whole dark night …

like the fear in my chest was spreading as I heard Dr. Doom yell even louder.

I studied the fireworks leaping and flaring like some ballet of fiery angels. I jerked as I heard Mama yelp and hit the floor hard.

The exploding stars of green, red, and gold seemed to call out to me.

Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw her boyfriend lumber into the room like some mean bear.

I smiled and sighed. Time for my word of the night. I tumbled off the sil into the darkness.


I spread my arms wide as if I were flying.

The wind caressed my hair, my face. I smiled bigger.
I was free. Free! Fre …



  1. Love this! Happy 4th to you :)

  2. Wow, that's a touching piece. It made me want to jump inside, embrace the girl, slap the mother, and shoot Dr. Doom. Sadly, little light is shined on this topic, so I applaud you for having the courage to write about something that is vastly ignored in America.

  3. Hope you have a wonderful day of celebration Roland. Even though there is no hint here that today marks anything other than a date on the calendar, my heart knows and celebrates with you.

  4. Now that's a great way to celebrate the Fourth.

    Very original, that's for sure!

    Have a great one, Roland :)

  5. So sad that was her best option.
    Happy Fourth, Roland.

  6. There is another option or two, one takes tremendous courage - to report the problem. The other (eliminate the problem) is unsavory to most, but so is the problem.

    A major illness in society keeps getting pushed under the rug. Kudos to you, Roland, for lifting that rug to show what hides beneath.

  7. Wow. I'm with Celeste. And DG. Beautiful, poignant piece, Roland.

    Hope you're well!

  8. Julie:
    Happy 4th to you, too! :-) I've missed you.

    As a family counselor, I saw too many examples of this little girl who would never be free of the scars and nightmares. With determination and love, they grew into healthy, loving adults but never the ones they would have been without their own Doctor Dooms.

    Alice and Victor are my way of washing my mind out from the Doctor Dooms I saw in my practice.

    As Sam might say, "Wherever a Texican stands becomes a little bit of Texas." So Norway is a bit of America within your mind. May your 4th be happy, too. :-)

    May you and your family have a great 4th, too!!

    Like D.G. said, there were other options -- she just couldn't see them for her despair and sense of being helpless and damaged. May your 4th be healing!

    Sometimes the way seems so dark that little girls cannot see any other path but escape. Reporting takes courage ... and believing ears which sometimes is not the case -- then matters are worse.

    Not too many young girls have access to guns.

    But you are right: there are other options. Let us hope similar little girls find the light and the strength to take them.

    I'm glad you "liked" my spotlight on a hidden problem in today's society. I hope your Canada Day was fun!

    Words Crafter:
    I have the day off for once, though I am still on call. I hope your 4th is fun!

  9. it's rained buckets here all day. we've just watched movies, played on the puter, and i did a little writing. lazy but nice.

  10. Hi Roland .. living near Beachy Head England's best known falling off point - and having experienced that side of life .. so desperate and so sad ...

    Life is valuable as I know and wish it had not ended so early ...

    I hope you can get some relief over this coming weekend - but I expect your services will more in demand .. with thoughts - Hilary