So you can read my books

Monday, October 7, 2013


"Wake up, Roland!"

My eyelids were pried open by tiny furred, clawed fingers.  "WAKE UP!"

I suddenly realized I was no longer in my bed but was slumped in my chair at my table at Meilori's, the haunted French Quarter jazz club.

"Aw, Ratatoskr!  I haven't slept since Friday night."

Perched on my table, the Asgardian squirrel inhaled an entire bar of Melkesjokolade chocolate in a single bite.  "Sleep?  Sleep!?  I never sleep!"

He poured the contents of an entire sugar bowl into a glass of ice tea and gulped it down in three swallows, and I muttered, "What a surprise."

A ghost slowly materialized beside me in a director's chair.  I stiffened as Alfred Hitchcock intoned to the Asgardian squirrel, "You promised me an epic, rodent!"

[Photo courtesy of Stan Osborne]

Another ghost formed beside him.  Aw, jeez.  A young man in wig, Victorian dress, and long, long knife.

File:Psycho (1960 film) shower scene.jpg

"You promised I would be entertained," shrilled the man in a falsetto voice.

Ratatoskr reared on his hind legs outraged, "You doubt Ratatoskr?  You will see an Epic!  An Epic!"

Meilori's darkened much to the displeasure of everyone else in the club, and a misty image of a book's cover enlarged to fill the room:

"Jack," gravely intoned Hitchcock.  "if that cover is not soon replaced with an epic, you may have  ...  fun with the squirrel and the scribbler."

"Ratatoskr!" I snapped, grabbing the squirrel by the throat and shaking him.

The Squirrel chittered, "I am not in need of fluffing, Roland!"

The knife flashed up.  Ratatoskr wiggled out of my fingers and gestured with his own.  Siv Maria's cover was replaced by flowing images and music:

Hitchcock nodded ponderously, "Interesting. Evocative. But no dialogue."

'Jack' shrilled, "No sex!"

And with that, the ghost took off after a yelping, scampering Ratatoskr. 

Hitchcock turned to me and sighed, "Modern audiences these days.  All they want is sex and blood."

Follow Siv this week to see what the Norse gods have to say.

Each day this week Siv will be giving away prizes which include an autographed copy of Secrets of the Ash Tree

including a print of the Freya illustration, a 15 dollar gift certificate from Amazon, assorted norwegian chocolates and trolls.

Come back tomorrow for a peek at what a few Norse Gods think of the Secrets of the Ash Tree and another glimpse of the most unusual club, Meilori's.


  1. No sex is all right by me.
    Ready for Siv on Wednesday and her blogfest!

  2. Alex:
    You're very gracious and kind to share your blog with Siv for her blogfest!

  3. Hmmm, Stupid Squirrel ate all my chocolate! Thanks to Hitchcock for supporting my lack of blood and sex on this video, who would have figured :) Thanks Roland for your support despite that greedy squirrel!

  4. Siv:
    Oh, Ratatoskr and I are buddies. I just have to keep buying sugar ... and watching my back for his tricks!

    Best of luck with sales!

  5. Does this mean we can expect thunder and lightning for the weather forecast?

    I'll be back to see the Meilori's post. Good luck to Siv!

  6. Wonderful, loved the trailer!

    Great job, see you both tomorrow, a double birthday party! I expect a two pieces of cake!

  7. D.G.:
    More like smog ... as in Smaug!

    Yes. wasn't that trailer great? And her son made it! What a birthday present!!

  8. Hi, Roland....

    Clever and fun as ALWAYS....

    LOVE the trailer... My illustration looks fierce with movement...

    The fiery title is AMAZING!!!!!! Your son did a fantastic job, Siv....

    See you both tomorrow and HAPPY PRE-BIRTHDAY!!!!!

  9. Michael:
    Doesn't your title look amazing with the moving fiery effect? Siv should be very proud of her son's achievement. And HAPPY NOT-BIRTHDAY to you. You have more of them, you know. :-)

  10. Great trailer and that chocolate looks devine. mmm